Butch Otter and his family woke up to an interesting figure in their grass yesterday.  A giant Phallus burned into the grass.  Well actually they don't live in the house, which was just recently donated by a local Potato magnate.  The figure is 60 feet tall, and was made (likely) with Roundup.  As Mark Reed, manager of a local gardening center put it, "It pretty much kills anything, especially when the heat is on it," Reed said. "When it's 100 degrees, it would take it down pretty quick." If the perpetrator used a backpack sprayer, Reed said, the job would be pretty easy.

This is the first Phallus symbol to strike a Gov's mansion yard.  However, sources tell me they have plagued school-house desk for decades.  Some are blaming local youth.  Authorities are concerned this could lead to a spread of Phallus-like symbols on other important lawns.